Tuesday, February 10, 2009

soon you'll be leaving your man



there's this intrinsic and contradictory personality tic I've always possessed, that change makes me dreadfully uncomfortable, but stagnancy drives me (in a quite literal sense) insane. the fabled holy bovine of transformation has time and again proven that she doesn't give up the milk for free, and this time I already feel that I'll be paying in spades to receive what I know is priceless: opportunity. and of course, great pizza.

a strange calm has fallen over me with 13 days until I fly, despite that this is the most impulsive, debatably insane thing I've ever done. there's a lot to miss, but I'm through looking back. I adore san francisco for making me who I am, but I won't be leaving an empty nest here. it is feathered with my loves and my legacy, for better and often times worse, and someday I'll be back. I have no expectations but to experience all of the firsts that make the lasts I've been savoring worthwhile. sometimes it takes falling hard into an old lover's arms to feel ready to hold my own hand.

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